This podcast is wild, we go deep into "A Man & His Symbols":
And so much more, let's go
This book fires me up
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This podcast is wild, we go deep into "A Man & His Symbols":
And so much more, let's go
This book fires me up
FREE Mindset Webinar: https://www.coreyboutwell.com/mindsetupgrade
Join The Community Here: https://www.coreyboutwell.com/communitymembership
Make sure you listen to the podcasts all the way through to get your discount code.
Don't be seen in this. I'm gonna leave from here. I'm gonna avoid this text message, I'm not gonna reply to these people, I'm just gonna show on my phone instead. As you've all seen, jordan Peterson talks about Carl Jung and refers to him quite regularly, and Carl Jung is essentially the father of the person who invented psychology. He literally invented psychology and personality types super smart and if you look through a lot of modern literature that people write in psychology, at the foundation of everything Carl Jung has been the creator. He created like the 16 personalities and the personality types and all those things If you've seen any of that around here.
Speaker 1:So in this video in particular, I have read some of Carl Jung's books. Out of recommendation from Jordan Peterson, I've read this book, amenity Symbols, and I'm gonna get into a part one of this book in this podcast episode. So if you get anything out of this and you're super pumped, please subscribe or follow us for that one. Yes, so this is intense and this is gonna be a very in-depth podcast. So if you're like, oh, I want something to chew and I wanna like listen and relax to something, this isn't gonna be the one. This is for you If you're hardcore into personal growth, shadow work and wanna understand the inner workings of your mind and you crave and you yearn for depth and meaning and making courageous decisions with your life. This podcast is I'm gonna be running through my notes of this book and I can't wait to reread this again, like I have just have a lot of stuff under here that's see the bottom of this page that's been highlighted underneath for quotes and things that I think is really powerful. And what I did when I read this book was I went through and I wrote notes out for the entire thing, like I'm just writing hella notes and essentially I've taken these notes. I'm gonna run over my notes and explain them to you so you understand what they're like. So I'm gonna try to give this like keep this to around 30, 40 minutes because honestly, it gets pretty in depth, to the point where you're like whoa, and as I'm talking like in real time, I'm going to be like figuring things out and redefining things in my brain, because I've had like a read over this and when I read over things like trigger things in my brain that I've learned because I've also read a bunch of other books. Some other ones I'm gonna be getting into soon is Robert Bly, as I and John Thus spoke. Zarathustra by Frederick Nietzsche, and at the moment I've been obsessed Well, jesus, fascinated with this book called Facing Shame and it's all helping me with my personal growth.
Speaker 1:Community set the standard, which is a men's personal development community for entrepreneurs and business people who are looking to get to the next level. Our vision is amazing and we're just, we're really helping people level up. We've got the education, we've got community, we've got live group coaching calls and if you're interested, you can book in a call with me down below. But before that, let's get stuck into this book Men and His Symbols and the Notes and like my takeaways, which I think are pretty powerful, like everyone's gonna have different takeaways from the book, I've only known I think there's two other people who enjoyed my community, who actually read the book, and my content manager. He's read the first chapter and has taken him like a few months. He's like I got through the first chapter and my mind is blown. He said to me he's like I was talking to one of my friends and they felt like a stranger to me after reading this and he's like and it was great. I was like well, how fantastic is that? So I'm gonna go through my notes and let's just dive deep. Hey, let's just get straight in there.
Speaker 1:So one thing that he talks a lot about in the book is actually taking symbols seriously, like a man and his symbols. Essentially, what is meant by the title is symbols, is referring to symbolism. So if you have a dream and you something represents a bear for you, the role of you having a dream, understanding that there's a bear there, is to ask yourself what does that symbolize to you? What does a bear symbolize to you? And the next time I say if you have the dream and you're conscious enough in your dream to turn around and look at it, it could be like your dad, or it could be a younger version of yourself or something like that. Right, so that's what he means by man and his symbols.
Speaker 1:And symbols have been used throughout the longest time through history, religions, everything to really represent something like the circle is a symbol, and the circle I think it's a symbol of spiritual wholeness. A square is a symbol of the body, and then a square and a circle together is the body within the soul. And if you look at a lot of Aztec stuff, they've got a lot of images of, like circles within squares, right, which is so interesting, like so interesting. So symbols mean a lot because that's how our brain recognizes things, like not just through words, but through symbols, and the letter, essentially, is almost a symbol, or words almost a symbol, and then there's images that we have used throughout the longest period of time. So we get into those and we figure out, like, okay, what are these actual symbols?
Speaker 1:And that's just really important to be aware of, to understand that, hey, we got to take our dreams seriously, and the reason that we want to take our dreams seriously is because of the symbolism from our subconscious that it's sending into our brain, because we don't just think in words. Like when you think about things like imagine if you just wrote everything out in your brain, right, ascendances and paragraphs, whenever you thought about something, it's not going to happen. When you think about something, what is going to happen is you're going to picture an image or a scene or like a video in your brain and you go whoa, like remember that moment, or I see this thing, or look at this idea, and the idea sometimes just a feeling, and the feelings get expressed through symbols, which is really awesome. So they've written down my notes here. Like dreams are expressions of your unconscious right. So yeah, and like it gets pretty hardcore into the stuff here and I was like I don't know if I'm going to mention this stuff because it might put people off the book, but you know what? Screw it. Like we're here to go deep. So essentially, there is an archetype called the great mother and it's like one of the first archetypes and essentially, if you don't know what an archetype is like, put your thinking cap on. Guys, we're going in. We're going in deep here. This is an in-depth podcast.
Speaker 1:An archetype is almost like a certain personality trait that you have to explain it in simple ways. However, it's usually linked to a part of your shadow or a part of your personal growth and most of the time, an archetype can like you can make unconscious decisions out of your archetype. Like if you ever react back to a partner, right, you get reactive or angry or grumpy or frustrated or avoidant and you're like, oh no, and you just get like really reactive. That is usually an archetype playing. Sometimes, if you're in a leadership position, you're standing in front of people warm. Here's another archetype. When I walk home into my house here's another archetype I've got to play. But if you're the archetype of the boss and the leader, which is usually like the king or the ruler or something, and then you go home and you have that archetype and you go home to your partner Like your partner's gonna be like get away from me and like unconscious projections are gonna be going everywhere.
Speaker 1:So the great mother is the one that tries to like hug everyone and keep them close and you see, this is like the great manipulator and that it's sort of the one who's like I really need to be needed. So, subtly and unconsciously, I'll try to weave things with you and do things extra for you so that you feel obliged to hang out with me and you want to stay with me all the time. That is the archetype of the great mother. It's the one who does not want. It's the story of the mother who doesn't want to lose her son. I want to keep him, or my daughter, whatever it is.
Speaker 1:So example is that your dream could be you having sex with your mom. We have crazy dreams, right? So don't tell me that you haven't had any weird ass dreams, but like having sex with someone that you shouldn't Cause. That happens in dreams all the time, but whatever what that may mean in terms of the great mother archetype is like you're taken by the great mother archetype and you're actually being a simp and you're being really needy, right, so that's what could be showing up in the actual dream. It's like, wow, so it's got nothing to do with the person. Whatever your sexual dreams will happen in the dreams, it's like, okay, what does mom symbolize to you? Like, what does it mean to you? Not anything else.
Speaker 1:So sometimes you have like dreams like a lot of people have this about them cheating on their partner, or the part of cheating on them, right? It's like, okay, well, what does your partner actually symbolize to you? And then, what does cheating symbolize to you as well? And it could be that like maybe a and it has to relate to you and you got to feel it. Like you got to feel it and really dissect it, which is handy, having someone there, cause doing it by yourself is crazy. But let's say, for example, you're like your ex represents to you like an old version of yourself, like an old lover, how you were like you know, a few years ago.
Speaker 1:And then you have a dream about cheating and it's like maybe you're betraying that person of yourself. Right, there's a part of yourself that you're betraying with the decisions that you're making now. Maybe you started drinking and you quit drinking, like four years ago. Next minute, you haven't all these dreams about your pain, like what the hell. But what I found in my own experience analyzing these things is most of the time it has something to do with your partner or an ex, ex ex partner and it's just showing up now You're like what is going on, which is crazy. So it's interesting to pay attention to those things, because that is like Hypothetically understanding what a symbol is and I need you guys to understand that. So, which is really cool. So, yeah, it's interesting.
Speaker 1:Like there's like some notes here is like hero symbols arise when the ego needs strengthening. So if you starting seeing symbols of swords or whatever it is, it's like you know my ego needs. It needs needs strengthening here, not letting go, like a lot of people think and I know this happens regularly. People are, you know, like right on holiday's, ego is the enemy. Haven't read the book, like I have not read the books. I'm not commenting on that, but I don't know if he's being cheeky with the two in the title, the hex I haven't read it, however with the actual statement of ego is the enemy depending on the context. In the context that we're talking about, like a turning on the context, a hundred percent right, but depending on our context, I would say it was wrong, because it's really good to have a healthy ego when needed and then be able to disable it. So we want to be able to use our ego full on and then bring it back.
Speaker 1:And there's different parts of the ego to depending on one. Like some great philosophers, like Sigmund Freud and stuff, said, it's got like the id, the elephant, whatever it is that you, the super ego and the ego. So essentially, mission can be like, I don't know about that one. So, essentially, what was really cool, I really like in this one, is initiation rights break the cycle. So some men need to be aroused and others seduced. So depending on where a man or human in general they say man here, meaning men and woman in the text depending on where they're at with their life, and Initiation is the thing that breaks the cycle.
Speaker 1:And it's all linked to the hero's journey, which is why I read before reading this, I read like a hero with a thousand faces by Joseph Campbell and I read that out and that sort of maps out the hero's journey step by step by step by step by step. I'll have a link somewhere to hear to that. You can listen to it, and I'm also going to create some more content around the hero's journey because I believe it's the most powerful thing that we can use for our own growth. People use it for movies. We can use it for our own growth. Holy hell, like watch out Tony Robbins coming for you, so coming for you, make some eye contact with the camera right there. So with this initiation, right.
Speaker 1:So an initiation is what we do like in our retreats, for an example. So set the stand and retreat. One of ours is called the next level. We got a three-day weekend at a three-day workshop Retreat and we have a one day which is the next level. So next level retreat in the next level, and essentially what happens in those is it's like a Four-on ride of passage for men to come down this test. There's like games is all these different things, a lot of reflection and a lot of coaching, writing things down and figuring stuff out to basically basically break someone down and bring them back up Sort of like a Navy Seal camp, but for psychology and personal development.
Speaker 1:Like it's insane. You don't actually have to do the the Navy Seal stuff to like break someone down. We use a lot of behavioral stuff. It's actually nuts is the best thing that we've ever created there. We had the comments that we've had it, just nuts. So I've been amazing. I shouldn't say nuts, I got. I got some nuts in between my legs, but we're not. I'm. I'm referring to something positive here. So so Seven men need to be aroused. I'm feeling aroused right now. Let's go. Others need to be seduced and what happens is being aroused is actually getting excited. I mean, whoa, I need to go break this cycle. Do this thing like part of this initiation Right which they do in armies. You know what I mean.
Speaker 1:There be certain tests and things that people can do for an initiation. In the modern world there isn't that many initiations right now. It's like you get you graduate from school. If you do, if you don't graduate from school, you miss out on the ceremony. Who graduate from uni? There's a ceremony there in between that period, especially in Australia. In other countries it's just drinking and taking drugs. Like that is literally the initiation ceremony that we have and who can party the longest, which, I believe, without the modulation of Really powerful, strong-centered, mature adults, it's just completely toxic, right Like, and there's nothing really facilitated for us to move forward.
Speaker 1:I do think there's another initiation which is coming across, which is people doing business courses and doing personal development and understanding content and making a life and a business out of e-commerce content, all the rest of it, and it's like this initiation is pay heaps of money for a course because the courses are expensive, and learn all the skills and the strategies and go kick some ass. And if you're not that person, then you're just gonna be living in the Matrix. So, essentially, like, some people need to be aroused, like yeah, come on, hi pup, let's go. Other people need to be seduced, and that's seduced into the initiation right and then seduced to the next cycle and same thing with the aroused. When they're with the seduced is sort of like a Instead of like come on, let's go, we need to do this. It's more of like an attraction, like showing people and seeing like how good it looks, like a wow, like I really need to be a part of that thing, and it's like well, you're invited, and they think, holy shit, like I'm invited to this thing yet and especially when it's exclusive, bring some of that in. There works really well for sales, which is cool.
Speaker 1:And the reason for the initiation rights and consistently breaking the cycles, depending on what heroes journey you're in, is to go on your own Personal pilgrimage. It's like our whole life. Everyone says they know the quote. It's not the end goal, it's the journey, right, but what does that even mean? Because we hear it all the time and sometimes it confuses. It confuses me because I'm like I hear it so many times I take the meaning out of it. So the meaning is personal pilgrimage is to live good.
Speaker 1:Initiate is to live a really high quality heroes journey, one after the another and Consistently making sure that we're pill, pill, grimaging for ourselves, which a lot of it's facing off with our own shadow, shadow. So we think that you know our life is building a business, is leaving a legacy, is, you know, creating the family and doing the things. But realistically, looking at this is how far you can go down into your own shadow and get back out and win, which is why some people find it very difficult to do personal growth and learn the psyche and learn all this stuff, because it's quite confronting to look at like versions of yourself and parts of yourself that are clouded in shame and are fogged by guilt and having to face those things and then be like, okay, how do I overcome these? Like it consistently every single day. There's no end to it, and I believe that Like running through that of like okay, life's really good, here's the shadow.
Speaker 1:Identify the shadow or a little bit of a breakdown, go through a repair phase and then let's start again, is extremely healthy way to become aware of our shadows and integrate our own identities to ourselves. Pausing here so that you guys can just lock this in your brain Take a breath Hectic, right, a lot of information there. So one of the things that we can do for that is I really like this with you. Know, maybe it's the shadow. Some people talk about an integration with the shadow in here. They also talk about a disintegration with the shadow. Right, and essentially, the less attention you pay to it and put in, the darkness gets bigger and it grows. So we don't want to disintegrate with our shadow. We want to integrate with our shadow every single day. So instead of maybe it's the shadow, it is, is most likely going to be the shadow, which is the importance of shadow work, and a lot of shadow work is just literally, it's just looking at the uncomfortable parts of yourself like to summarize it real shortly.
Speaker 1:You see things that's like, oh, that's not me, that's not me, oh, that is you. Most of the time is regarded in shame and the definition for shame with a shadow, the manipulation all that stuff comes from is shame is what's wrong with me, guilt, is I did something wrong, when the shame is a lot more powerful. Because if it's something wrong with me, what do you try to do? Ladies and gentlemen, drum roll, please Bang. You try to hide that shit. Oh, so toxic. Don't be seen in this. I'm gonna leave from here. I'm gonna avoid this text message. I'm not gonna reply to these people, I'm just gonna show on my phone instead. Hope. I hope that never happens again. Like I'm not gonna be seen like this, I'm gonna wear oversized t-shirt to the gym so no one can look at my muscles. That was me, by the way. I had really big muscles and wanted to hide them, not anymore. So bring it on.
Speaker 1:So essentially, yeah, it's really interesting that that happens and we don't want a big, huge, scary shadow. We want to be like like Peter Pan. Right, you know how Peter Pan has his try to get a bar of soap and he's trying to like glue his shadow on. But it's interesting that I forgot her name, mary or something. She stitches the shadow back onto Peter Pan's foot. That represents the feminins. Restitching the shadow back onto Peter Pan, which is when Peter Pan finds his anima, which is the they talk about that in this. Here.
Speaker 1:There's two parts to a men's psyche. You've got the shadow and then beneath the shadow is the anima and the animus. For a man, the anima is the woman side of him, like the feminine side of him that is within the masculine, and the animus is the masculine side of the woman which is inside of her, and a whole part of our journey is to integrate that. Some people's less so, some is more so. So it was kind of said like around the 70s, a lot of men who are integrating with their feminine side a lot better by having the 70s, where people were like partying festivals, weed long hair, colorful shirts, all of those things. But essentially the feminine is really like opening your heart and being able to really integrate with love which actually makes a man a really strong, powerful leader, and then, as a woman, being able to integrate the animus which is, you know, it's the, it's the structure, it's the drive, it's the purpose that she has for her and understanding that and most of the time you know that can come around to family. So balancing those things inside yourself extremely powerful. So essentially, I love this quote.
Speaker 1:We are all pure love under our shadow masks. Just take that in for a second. If you're listening to this. I've been speaking really fast. We are all pure love under our shadow masks, which is the importance to take them off every day, consistently. Facing that, literally, is on the phone to my content manager today because I had shadow shit coming up and I'm like, oh my gosh, I can't make these decisions in my life right now. Some hectic stuff going on. You have to follow me on social media. Call about well if you want to follow along. But oh my goodness, there's some exciting things happening and it is scary. But so essentially, we want to keep doing that because there's so much love underneath here and we, because of shame, we protect ourselves, because we don't want to be seen and with that, without like shadow masks, like we always see a reflection of what we lack. So every time we get triggered and then like, yeah, that happens all the time, integrity is taking the conscious. Yes, this is really powerful. I like this quote. So integrity is taking the unconscious seriously and it's gotta get harder before it gets easier. So that is the commitment to integrity. When someone's asked what is integrity, it's honestly, it's taking the unconscious seriously and it's gotta get harder before it gets easier.
Speaker 1:What is meant by the unconscious is shadow, shame, guilt, reactivity. Sometimes it could be pressure, stress, like all of these different things where, where you're taking reactions that you're not 100% in control of. Sometimes you're in a conversation with someone and you might speak to them and like you're having a chat and you just say some stuff and you're like, man, that wasn't me, why do I unconsciously lie then? Right now, that's your unconscious making decisions. Or whenever you have a business deal or something else is happening and you're like, oh, I get scared, I don't want to do this business thing. Or like, what do I even do now? I feel like I lost my purpose again. Or like, oh man, I wish my wife just wasn't so angry at me all the time.
Speaker 1:It's like well, that is time for you to take your unconscious seriously, because your unconscious is currently in control and if you want to get back into control, we have to let go of the control that our unconscious is trying to have and put ourselves into control of what is more conscious and is true to us. And eventually, over a period of time, if I keep looking, we end up making these patterns conscious, make the unconscious conscious and then the conscious unconscious, which is unconscious competence. I don't know if you guys have seen that square of like being like okay, like the unconscious competence, conscious competence and make it unconscious. So eventually, like you create patterns of getting so aware of this stuff that then it starts to happen automatically and you're like oh, thank God, and you've got healthy patterns in your life and it's unconscious and you're like this is how I want it to be, because it's been reprogrammed in my brain and that's what we do at Set the Standard. So we see that happening all the time on live coaching calls and the program stuff, which are elite. So, yes, you can head to that one Links down below if you want to join. Just put in a call with me, let's go. Yes, and obviously it gets harder before it gets easier. So that's just the thing, and most of the times the hard.
Speaker 1:If we're going to explain what the hard is during for this work, that is facing off with your own stuff and it's pretty crazy, the power of what you see Like we see this in our retreats all the time or someone having the shame or this guilt on their soul, on their chest right, and it's just real powerful, just speaking it out loud and expressing it from your body to someone. All gone, pressure, stress gone, no gone. We had one guy come back to our retreat because he had this thing about. It was like it was just something he regretted with his partner that he did, and he's like I come back to this retreat just to get that off my fucking chest and I'm so happy I did, and it was like nice and like it wouldn't be able to get it out or text someone or tell someone is I need to go and claim this shit in front of a group of studs who I respect and have them forgive me for it so that I can move the hell on. Now he's building huge businesses and doing all this like wild things in his life that he loves to do and open up and put way more love with his partner, which is beautiful.
Speaker 1:So also mentioned here, there are three kinds of people he man and his symbols, sciencey people, spiritual people and then both. So people that are in both right. So science people are the explainers. They're the ones who explain everything right. Spiritual people are everything happens for a reason which I think sort of works really well with Glenn, my head coach in my community, and myself, because I'm more sciencey. I'd say he's more spiritual, and then we have a really good blend of both. But both makes that happens that there's conflicts between both of them, and this can also happen with inside your psyche. So and some people are actually both, I'd probably say that for myself over developing that I'd definitely be more of a both and that took hard work to get to.
Speaker 1:I think I was actually more spiritual than sciencey. I went very sciencey reading all this stuff, but it's about spiritual things and then I got more spiritual and esoteric and it's been quite fantastic. But also, yeah, the conflicts between the two are great because you have conflicts between both and that is when you understand high quality communication, you understand your shadow and the unconscious. You can work through it, fantastic. So I'm just gonna get a little bit into consciousness now and actually talk about what consciousness is right. So it's just a crazy concept and this just gets deeper and deeper and deeper and then I'll talk about the shadow and then we'll leave it there until part two. So essentially I say essentially a lot, let's go.
Speaker 1:That was unconscious. Look at my unconscious becoming conscious, because I like that word. Man has developed consciousness slowly and laboriously, in a process that took untold ages to reach a civilized state which is arbitrarily dated from the invention script of about 4,000 BC. And this evolution is far from complete, for large areas of the human mind are still shrouded in darkness. Whoa, okay, so it just means that, like our whole consciousness has developed really slowly, so it just takes and it takes time.
Speaker 1:So the individual psyche is far from being synthesized, it is only a fragment, too easily under the onslaught of unchecked emotions. So essentially what that means is like, by checking and understanding and taking a reverence towards your emotions is like that's what helps you, one way of synthesizing your psyche to become more conscious, really powerful. There's a quote somewhere. It's like emotions are divine in fluxes trying to tell you something, and they're not always bad. Fear isn't, it's just an emotion. It's not real. So, even though it's real in your body, it's not actually real cause it's like, it's like an emotion. So well, people would argue for that of being. It's real. It's not real but it's only happening inside your mind. So, and on side your body and people can see it and smell it and that's about it. So, to the individual, I like this definition here is we can, too, become disassociated and lose our identity. We become possessed and altered by moods, or become unreasonable and unable to recall important facts about ourselves and others, so that people may say what the hell has gotten into you. So, whatever that happens is understanding like okay, I like this terminology.
Speaker 1:You might hear Jordan Peterson talk about it quite often, but he says like this person was possessed, and he says it and he's like and he's a Canadian accent and the possession is quite true, right, if you think about, for example, sometimes you just walk to the fridge and you're like what the hell open it. Or these days it's like hey, just checking my phone, and you're like yep, yep, get off my damn phone. Like you just know yourself scrolling, that's when you're on TikTok or YouTube shorts or Instagram or something, and you're like how the hell did I get on here? What is going on? Sometimes you're like someone's talking to you and then you're writing or you're typing and you just typed out what they said. You're like what is going on here?
Speaker 1:It's interesting, because that is like a sign of possession and understanding that we can be possessed for months and years and years and weeks, which is actually quite scary to know that we're not completely in control, especially with someone who's what has gotten into you, like, is this actually me or is it not? Now, there's two parts to this to understand, and this is some cori stuff here, not the book stuff. One is that the role of a hero there's come from heroology and hero myth that I've studied is when you do find out parts of yourself, when you do start getting in control and you do start to understand your emotions and you're like, oh, my goodness, there's this idea and this level and this version of myself that I want to bring into the real world. Bring it. But know that when you do bring it, some people will project against you their shadows.
Speaker 1:What has gotten into you, and your role and your duty is to maintain that and hold it and they may say hey, what has gotten into you? See, you guys, I'm on my purpose right now. That's what's gotten into me. Instead of being like, oh, is there something wrong with me? Is this because sometimes shame goes off? Should I actually be doing this thing? Am I questioning this decision? No, questioning of the decision.
Speaker 1:When you're on your hero path, you are on it, right, you are on that thing and you're going for it, so go for it. And you got to hold everyone else's projections, which is essentially when they project on you. What's gotten into you? What the hell are you doing? It's just a mirror reflection. Back at that. You want to deflect those things and be like yeah, well, I'm on my purpose. What's wrong with you? Why does that trigger you? You know what I mean. You say that and immediately, whoop, that's back onto them. You're not focusing on oh, there's something wrong with me. Which is really important. That's one which is the positive way. And then you've got the negative way, which is like, when you are possessed by something negative, because you could be possessed by something positive, run with that. If you're possessed by something positive, why wouldn't you want to keep that? But if you're possessed by something negative and it's not serving you and you're acting like an idiot or like you're being the funny person. Ha ha, I'm gonna crack some jokes. I'm like what have gone into you? Why are you cracking jokes? And you told me that you don't go to bed after 12 pm, so why are like 12 midnight, so why are you out with your mates until three o'clock in the morning? That's really unintegral.
Speaker 1:Coming back to the integrity piece, right, and it's like that's the thing when you're talking about the integrity of like being, you know, knowing that, it's like taking your unconscious seriously. It's like, oh there, you were unconscious and you were out of integrity. Wow, can you guys see the power of this? Are you guys starting to hear it? Can you see it? Can you feel it? It's like, oh, this is real powerful. Getting clear of this stuff. It's a little bit icky because it's like holy, this is like deep right.
Speaker 1:So we talk about being able to control ourselves, but self-control was a rare and remarkable virtue, right, because we're not exactly. It's sort of like in here the book, I would say on this quote it's more of like an influence. We try to influence ourselves rather than control, but I do believe that we can have quite like really good self-control and get like a pretty damn basis of control, but we also wanna not control everything, because it takes the beauty out of everything as well. So we wanna be in and out of control and really influence sort of like, let's say, a conductor of a band you know what I mean who's conducting like an orchestra.
Speaker 1:We may think we have ourselves under control, yet a friend can easily tell us things about ourselves which we have no knowledge, which is interesting. We do this exercise at St Eddard Community where, when you get to a certain level, you gotta send five people a text message and it's like asking them a question for direct feedback, positive and negative. And the negative feedback we always say well, that's true, because that's how they perceive you, they could have you something, and you know it's not 100% true in yourself, but it's not embodied if they don't see it Very interesting. So and it's like they'll tell you these things about yourself and you're like, wow, I knew all of these things, but these things I actually had no idea. Thank you for telling me, which is a great example here. So say like, oh, do we have full control? Then it's like, oh, maybe we don't.
Speaker 1:An ability to control one's emotions may be very desirable from one point of view, would be questionable accomplishment from another, for it would deprive social intercourse of variety, color and warmth. Very interesting Social intercourse. So this is, I would say, like having an awareness of when to be in control and we're not controlled. If you're a control freak, that's the thing that I was mentioning before and it is healthy to be able to surrender and let go regularly and not being controlled, cause if you control of everything all the time that's honestly, most likely from some other books that I've read is you running away from shame? I'm gonna try to control everything, because if I'm out of control, I'm gonna get hurt, I'm gonna be embarrassed, people gonna see me for a fraud or a fake or whatever it is. Fuck that shit. We wanna lean into that. So, okay, let's get into the initiation process and the shadow. This is really cool, all right. So what is the initiation process, baby, that we've mentioned and talked about in here? That is a right of submission, a period of containment and a further right of liberation. So this is really cool, like.
Speaker 1:I feel like a really high quality initiation would be the Navy SEALs doing Navy SEALs training, like David Goggins did when he was gone crazy. That is a right of passage. I feel like one of the reasons if I was to explain why David Goggins is so powerful and so out there and doesn't give a hell what anyone thinks and is accomplishing all these great things is because he's intentionally putting himself under initiations, consistently hardcore ones, something out of his comfort zone, boom, next initiation, next initiation. And I went to Dr Andrew Huberman on the weekend to listen to him talk and he was mentioning there's a part of your brain which literally strengthens it and increases willpower and that's done by doing things he don't wanna do. And I was like, well, who can see that? That part of David's brain would be solid as hell. So right of submission would be something like that. But they can also be done.
Speaker 1:Ceremony, and any sort of ceremony, is a right of passage. Marriage, beautiful, a beautiful way of an initiation into the next phase of each other's wedding. It's like my partner's like I don't really mind too much of having a wedding or not, like I'm not phase only when a few people there, because I'm just throwing under the bus here probably some family, shame that she's going on. But I'm like I want, like the best wedding ever, specifically because of that initiation ceremony, to declare our love to have that next phase into the next journey, cause it is so beautiful and powerful.
Speaker 1:The ego accuses responsibility of obstruction whence deadly boredom. Ego accuses responsibility of obstruction whence deadly boredom. I feel like I need some time to dissect that and get back to that cause right now. Hell, nah, maybe we could try for it. Ego accuses responsibility of obstruction. So essentially saying all there's heaps of different stuff it gets in the way and it's everyone else's things is getting in, the way's fault and their problem. As to like, when you're bored, which is actually boredom is a symptom of anger, so it's like okay, if I'm angry and I'm bored, that's when I start accusing everything that's getting in my way. It's that thing's fault which is playing the victim, pointing the blame game.
Speaker 1:When you're sick or bored of life and it's ready for a new change, that is when you have reached the start of the individuation process. The individuation process is sort of like a sequence of initiations in order to get to yourself the best version of yourself. We say high self and stuff, but it's really the best version of yourself is explained a lot of different ways. It's not becoming something. It's actually removing away all of the layers to completely express of who you are, because who you are is amazing and beautiful and unique and powerful, and the only thing that gets in the way of that is all of the masks and stuff that we put on ourselves. So getting to the best version of yourself is actually more of just a process of authenticity, which is called individuation process, like the word individual. Individuation, becoming an individual, is essentially what it means.
Speaker 1:So the process begins when one has painful realizations about oneself and one's own conscious attitudes and swallows all sorts of bitter truths which can show up as necessary villain from the dark side. So painful realizations about oneself, r-r-r-r-r-r-rations, so painful realizations about oneself is like wow, I'm not who I thought I was. I am a bit of a fraud. I am really lazy. I'm not doing this thing here. I'm not as good enough partner, I'm not taking responsibility. I really wanna be here and I'm not right now. I'm actually 40, I've got kids and I'm not connecting them with the way that I would like to be, and I have this prostitute addiction and I'm fucking shameful about that and I never wanna talk about it.
Speaker 1:Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, right, all of these things that could be coming up is like okay, when you're having those realizations about yourself and need to change. Holy moly, a lot of people have breakdowns, right. Anxiety, panic, attacks, all these different breakdowns and I encourage them for this exact reason. Right, it's like having those painful realizations Holy shit, I'm not where I wanna be, I'm gonna get out of my time, my girlfriend's gonna leave me. All of these things, holy shit, like blah, like all those things, is like a congratulations, like welcome to the phase of your individuation, the first phase, because it's not comfortable and it's very natural, I think, for human beings to have those sort of emotions and have those sort of breakdowns.
Speaker 1:But it's when people aren't looked after, is when the tribe isn't there to help them. It's when they haven't got community or friends around them, where it can actually be quite damaging, or they're not seeing a therapist to talk out all of these different things, or they're not a part of set the standard right To hold them accountable, to crush it and talk about and get through these things. So if they're not like in that, it can be very dangerous. But if there is when it used to be in society, people going through those things. Back in tribal days, everyone would talk about stuff.
Speaker 1:So one's own conscious attitudes really powerful, is a lot that talks about this, of like, you know, the biggest influence that anyone can have for the best growth possible so they can get the riches that they want, they can seek the career that they want, have the fulfillment that they want, the relationship that they want, make the impact they want, create how they want, all comes down to influencing your own attitude. Well, because think about it, when your attitude is bulletproof and it's amazing and you just have this great outlook on everything and you're unwaverable even if it gets down, things go down, you're just, you're gonna win. So so influencing your own attitude so powerful and it's sort of like perceptions and attitudes, I believe after doing a lot of this work, is the key to success. So if anyone wants like the biggest business returns or anything like that, or crushing it, and like making a huge impact or having a really good relationship or getting healthy and jacked as hell, most of it comes down to literally just changing your perception and your attitude. And it's like you know, some people get the wind of it and they carry that.
Speaker 1:And if you don't have the attitude and you haven't got the mental fortitude or the perception. And then it gets scary. You bail, you feel shame, you feel guilty about things, you don't make decisions, you show up as a fraud, like you may do all the things you tell your employees not to do. That's out of integrity because unconsciously you know you shouldn't be doing that. When you're out of integrity, catch you later. That's gonna ruin your attitude. You go into a business meeting with a real big dog who believes and he wants to invest in you and you're like I'm not worthy. Why am I not worthy? Because I'm living out of integrity with my employees. What Psh, psh, psh. All right, I hope this is blowing you guys brains out of the park right now and I hope you're taking it in. We're almost there, guys. We're almost there. So swallow all sorts of bitter truths. This is the hard part, right when you are having those panic attacks and realizing, holy hell, these things in my life aren't working how I'd like to work right now. Oh, my goodness, realizing these things. Swallow that shit.
Speaker 1:I love this quote. I can't remember who it was from, as one of the like, one of the higher ups in America, in the American government, but it was. I ate my words every single day and I found the diet quite nourishing. It's talking about eating the shadow. Right, it's talking about eating the shadow which comes from the dark side. Speaking of the shadow, let's get into it here, all right. So essentially the shadow.
Speaker 1:We've got a couple of different parts in that Anima and animus I talked beforehand. Okay, the purpose of the anima is in a man's mind and it's the feminine symbol behind the shadow for difficult and subtle ethical problems. Wow, which is really powerful for men? Because men who get in positions of power and do develop their ego and start to move through in life when they do start getting to problems, it is the subtlety. It is the line between purple and yellow. They're a very similar color and like when you start looking at them everywhere. But it's the subtlety in between which is really powerful, which looks like vague feelings, like if you know that you're not integrated, it's your anima isn't integrated. Vague feelings You're receptive to the irrational. So all this irrational thinking and stuff you'll go into that.
Speaker 1:Capacity for personal love is low. Your mood's up and down you have like part of it is some positive stuff and there's prophetic hunches. Oh, we got this hunch with this intuition, feeling for nature, the relationship to the unconsciousness, and positive capacity for personal love as well. So, which is really cool. Some other negative things is and it's usually shaped by your mom as well, your relationship with your mom, the anima. But it's being irritable, depressed, touchy, uncertain, insecure, and then like when you're receiving the anima and it's like coming in and it's a negative way. It's words like I'm nothing. Nothing makes sense For other people it's different, like I actually like nothing, I don't like anything anymore. All of those types of words and sentences that you say into yourself is literally just letting you know that the anima is there, which is interesting. These symptoms can lure a man into suicide.
Speaker 1:The anima has the potential for truth twisting and it can be known as the death demon, especially for men. It lures men away from reality like the poisoned damsel myth, and essentially what that is is like there's some sort of myth and the poison damsel works like this goes I need help, any help, come help me. And then it comes in poisons. The guy kills him. It's talked about in Greek myth. I can't remember what hero gets killed from that. One of the beautiful men gets like turned into a stag by a thien or something One of the goddesses, when he was out hunting them, and then his hunting pack go, kill him and eat him and drag him away. It's like a perfect story of the anima, like coming up and like eating your like psyche out, essentially. But yeah, it's extremely true and it's like it can be subtle and destructive and it can be have cheap truth twisting to it. To understand if those things are happening and you're having those thoughts, it's like, okay, there's some work here to do with the anima, which is dealing with those feminine aspects in your own mind that appears behind the own shadow. So it's like you know what it also does as well. Understand we're getting into it before we figure out a solution, cause you guys would be like holy hell, this sounds like the worst thing ever, but it's alive and it's real. And I want us to understand this, that it's playing all the time in our brains. And for women, it's the same thing for you guys, just the animus works differently in terms of the masculine I'll get into that until another episode though Unable to cope with the hardships of life.
Speaker 1:So if he has a positive experience with his mum, this is usually what happens. Unable to cope with the hardships of life, the anima is kind to turn men into sentimentalists. Feelings of tenderness, sadness, sensitive and nostalgia. Those people have a positive experience with his mum. The anima involves men in destructive intellectual games, prevents man, through its internal dialogue, getting in touch with life, like really getting in the flow, really getting into the grooves. If he has a real positive relationship with his mother, this is all positive relationship Reflects about life so much he can't live it and loses its spontaneous, the outgoing feeling. The most frequent forms of the anima take the form of erotic fantasy, which a lot of men is like watching porn, scrolling on TikTok girls.
Speaker 1:When a man does not sufficiently cultivate his feelings in relationships, when his feelings and attitudes towards life has remained infantile. When a man does not sufficiently cultivate his feelings in relationships, his feeling, attitude towards life has remained immature. So essentially what it's saying is there is like to really bring out your feeling with life will help cultivate your feelings in your relationships. A lot of them like two sides of the same coin your passion for relationship, your passion for life. Man fall in love too quickly and he can project and weave fantasies around her. The anima presence causes this. This is positive relationship with the mum.
Speaker 1:Solution to affairs if the anima is recognized. So the solution is if your anima is recognized as inner power, man to bring his own being to maturity by integrating unconscious personality and bringing it to real life. So this is bringing the unconscious conscious, so it's just becoming aware of these things behind you doing shadow work. You don't necessarily have to be like this is my anima speaking. I actually don't encourage that because it's such a massive wormhole to go down and to use and unless you're planning on becoming a coach, I don't think there's like much point. If you want to become like my friend and learn all this stuff and you think that I'm really cool and you wanna hang out with me and you can learn this and we can have chats about it, that'll be sick, so please do it for those reasons.
Speaker 1:But if not, then yeah, I'd say the best way to sort of look at it would be instead to be like okay, so where are just all these shadow things about myself? So where am I touchy? Where am I depressed? Where am I irritable? I wanna increase my capacity for personal love. I have these hunches Like what can I start looking at and most of the time is, parts are gonna be your relationship with your mum. Other parts are gonna be looking at where you feel, you know, shame and guilt, and being able to express and move through those things in a powerful way.
Speaker 1:But yeah, the positive side of the anima is it's responsible for finding the right marriage partner, digging out discerning facts from the logical mind hidden in the unconscious, which is really cool. So if you're somebody who has a powerful logical brain and you wanna get things out, it's like you wanna dig those facts out. They're hidden in the unconscious. The anima is responsible for that. So when you have like powerful ideas, that knows that you're online and you're doing the work aligning man's mind with the right inner values, opening the way to more profound depths so cool. So really getting clear on your own values and what you like and really leaning into them. So it's allowing you more depth and meaning and yearning in your life that feels more rich and fulfilling sort of bland sale and bleh, which we don't want and allows the voice of the great man or Ubermensch, frederick Nietzsche to be heard. So essentially, the positive anima is responsible for your higher self to be heard and to help you make decisions and to be able to look between the lines, whether the idea or something toxic, unconscious and going to be negative, and instead something that's gonna be positive and help you, like, move forward. So that is essentially. There's a little bit more in here, guys. Yo gonna have to hang on with me because I can feel you guys behind this thing being like holy shit, I don't know how much more of this I can take, but we're gonna fill up your brain anyway. Here you guys. Two more points.
Speaker 1:So the shadow gives away to impulses that do not belong to him. An overwhelming rage to a friend when they identify a fault within you. Self education is the labors one must do to overcome it. How powerful that projection or others are symptoms of the shadow. The shadow is not an opponent. It only becomes hostile when it is ignored or misunderstood.
Speaker 1:The shadow is the opposite of ego. It embodies qualities on dislikes and others. So the ego compares to the things that it likes to other people. Oh, my God, I wanna know that, let's go. The shadow is opposite. It embodies the qualities it dislikes on other people. The shadow has passionate desire. That is unreasonable. The heroic decision is the super human effort only possible if your higher self helps individuals carry it through. The overwhelming shadow power.
Speaker 1:Irresistible impulses should not always be heroically repressed.
Speaker 1:So some of those impulses, the irresistible ones, they shouldn't be repressed.
Speaker 1:Sometimes they're trying to tell you something.
Speaker 1:The shadow contains vital voices that should make an actual experience and not repress it. It is up to the ego to give its pride to live out something that seems to be as dark and it may not be, but it may require a sacrifice as heroic as the conquest of passion in the opposite. So sometimes that could be like moving you know what I mean Like holy hell to give up my pride or give up my business, sell my business, give this thing that I love, and I just need to let go and go away. That can be like healthy sometimes, but what is mentioned here and I'll leave it on this one is that actually two here. It takes a lot of courage to take the unconsciously seriously and tackle the problems it raises, and people are too lazy to consider how the unconscious affects them.
Speaker 1:So congratulations, guys, for getting through part one of this. That was a behemoth of a chat. I hope you learned something and if you have any questions, comments below, send me a DM and Corey Boutwell on Instagram and if you like this and you got any value out of this, please follow, share with someone. That would be amazing. And if you're interested in learning a little bit deeper on this and you're like, hey, no, I'm actually gonna work with Corey book in a call below, big love guys. See you in the next one.